Category Archives: Fun Stuff

The Art of Being Me

Posted on July 12, 2013 | Leave a comment

I’ve been spending waaaay too much time on Pinterest lately! Is that a good thing or a bad thing? My sense of what’s okay and what’s not okay seems to be a little skewed when it comes to cruising through the pins. I find myself flipping through the Photography board and the Geek board with joyful abandon, frittering away time that could be better spent writing or editing or (gulp!) cleaning. (But that’s another story!)

My boards are beautiful and relaxing. I find it calming and inspiring to scroll through Abundant Beauty, my collection of pins that range from beautiful flowers to glorious sunrises to majestic moons. Photography has never been my thing but there is a newfound sense of joy welling up in me and I find that I have a serious urge to run out and buy a good camera. Or at least skip on over to Amazon and do a little comparison shopping.

Photography might just be the one thing that would get me out of my cave on a regular basis. Then again, one can take only so many shots of the moon rising over the ocean or dawn breaking through the palms. I’m already feeling the pull of a road trip out west and having a camera in hand might nudge that fantasy into reality. Or I can pull up Pinterest and look at mountain ranges from around the world without ever having to leave my comfy cave.

As I move through the boards and pins, admiring some, laughing at others, I find little pieces of myself scattered here and there. I’ve been told that it’s a great marketing ploy to pin photos as representations of emotional moments in my books. “Look for things that evoke the emotions you want your readers to feel.” So, I have boards for Ripple and A Solitary Life and Martin Vane Says Hello and within those boards are the thoughts and emotions I felt as I wrote and edited and worked to pull my characters into being. Each board is a peek into my soul as well as a hint of what lies between the pages. Each pin is a choice that brings to light a sliver of me.

I’ve discovered that there is an art to being me just as there is an art to being you. Your likes and dislikes don’t define you as a whole being, but I believe there is true insight into what really matters in our lives. I don’t pin every pin that makes me cry but I’m beginning to see a pattern in my pins, a true collage of what it is that inspires me and keeps me whole. There is so much beauty in the world that I will never get to see. But I can see it through the eyes of a photographer, amateur or professional, who like me, yearns to capture the moments of life that define me, inspire me, and make me who I am. There is an art to being me and I’m refining it every day.

Just for Fun!

SONY DSC

I’ll be leaving for Scotland on Monday. As you may know, I’ve been planning this trip for two years as a surprise graduation present for my oldest daughter. The Big Reveal took place a couple of weeks ago to the accompaniment of bagpipes. I guess that’s another thing that can lure me from my cave: bagpipes! (Or maybe it’s the man in the kilt. )

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Internet, Society, Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , ,

Seven Dwarves Does a Week Make

Posted on July 10, 2013 | 3 comments

 seven-dwarfs1

Just for Fun!

I know. I usually post  Just for Fun! at the end of my blog, but I’ve been working on a new children’s book (which should tell you where my head is at the moment) and this little bit of whimsy just jumped right out at me. I hope you’ll bear with me.

As I sat at my computer early yesterday morning, it hit me that there just isn’t a definite feel to Tuesday. Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday all have a luster about them that generates a feeling, a tingly I-know-what-day-this-is feeling even if there is no special event planned.  Monday has an almost palpable edge to it. I can feel it just thinking about it. And Friday is giddiness wrapped up in a big bow of relief.

I wanted to write something witty about Tuesday, something definable about the second day of the work week and I came up empty handed. Nothing. Zero. Zip. Nada. What word would I use to describe Tuesday? Blah came to mind and then one thing led to another and I found myself with pen in hand (!) scribbling down the names of Snow White’s seven dwarves. Hmmm.

Anyway, here goes:

Grumpy = Monday. Definitely Monday. If I had a word-of-the-day calendar of my own, Monday’s word would always be “Arrggghh.” When I was working in an office, Monday was “catch-up” day, eight hours of catching up on all the things that should have been done on Friday–or the Friday before that.

Doc = Tuesday, the day to make decisions. Doc was the smart one of the dwarves, the one to whom they turned for advice. Having recovered from Monday, Tuesday is the day to get a handle on the week, the day to make a plan.

Dopey = Wednesday. I can’t tell you how many times I heard co-workers say, “This is hump day! I still have two more days to get that [fill in the blank] done!” Yep, Dopey.

Bashful = Thursday. This is the day to stutter and hide, to shuffle papers, to look busy, and to whisper about what’s been done or should be done or might be done by Friday.

Happy = Friday! Happy Friday, Happy Friday, Happy Friday! “Did you get your work done this week?” “Nope, but I’m happy. It’s Friday!”

Sneezy = Saturday, the day to spend time fishing or hiking or hunting for butterflies or whatever in the great outdoors. Ah, the great outdoors. I’m not allergic to anything and I don’t suffer from hay fever, but having free time on a weekend is nothing to sneeze at . . . no, wait. Outdoors, Sneezy, Saturday. It has to fit because there’s only one more day of the week and that has to be . . .

Sleepy = Sunday. This is the best day of the week to sleep late or nap in a hammock in the afternoon shade. Sunday’s are sleepy days for me, days to curl up with a book, to relax and snooze, and to think about the week ahead. Which leads me back to . . . “Arrggghh.”

Footnote

After the fact, I decided to do a quick search for other blogs, posts, or articles connecting dwarves with the days of the week. I knew there had to be something out there and lest someone point the finger of plagiarism, I wanted to be prepared. I found one blog post from November of last year. Click to read the post “Seven Days, Seven Dwarves.”

I also found a table of information at Ask.com. The names of Snow White’s Seven Dwarves have changed over the years but I stuck with the ones I knew from childhood, the 1937 Disney movie, Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. Apparently, in a 2001 version of Snow White, the days of the weeks replaced the names of the dwarves. Close, but no cigar.  The 2012 movie Snow White & the Huntsman not only changed the names of the dwarves but added an eighth, as did the television series, Once Upon a Time. (I’ll bet the writers are Beatles fans, as in “Eight Days a Week.“)

I hope you’re having a pleasant and productive Dopey and that I’ll see you on Bashful.

3 Comments

Posted in Fun Stuff, Movies, Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , ,

Finding a Happy Medium

Posted on July 9, 2013 | 2 comments

(And I don’t mean the kind with Taro cards or crystal balls.)

 OMG!

Have you ever been zipping along in your daily life, just going about your business thinking all is well and life is great, and then suddenly catch sight of yourself in a mirror or a window or a photograph and think, “What the hell happened?”  Freaky, isn’t it? That happened to me last week. All I can say, to quote yet another granddaughter, is OMG!

I have this image in my head of who I am and what I look like. I don’t think it’s unrealistic to say that most of us carry around in our heads, if not our wallets, an image that we define as “me.” We see ourselves in the mirror every day but the person in the mirror is not necessarily the person that we see in our mind’s eye, the strong, vibrant self that looks back with confidence–until the blinders come off and voila, there we are, the real “me” that we present to the world.

I am a Cave Dweller, after all!

My days are most often spent within the comfort of my cave. I don’t greet neighbors on a daily basis; I don’t entertain friends or have weekend company. I see family occasionally. I go out to lunch once a week (okay, sometimes I go). I go to the grocery store (when I have to) but I don’t think about how I look beyond brushing my teeth and hair, putting on clean clothes and a dab of lip gloss. Clothes are not my thing. I’ve been wearing the same two pairs of jeans and the same brown t-shirts (I have six) for quite a while now. They fit, they’re comfortable, and although sometimes I notice the jeans feel a little tighter than usual (damn that dryer!), I don’t think about how I look. I guess I focus on function and utility in my apparel rather than aesthetic appeal.

I guess it’s time for a reality check. While I’ve been snuggled in my comfy cave, writing, working, focusing on the virtual rendition of me, I’ve allowed the physical me, the one that appears in photographs, to atrophy. I’ve allowed tunnel vision to set in, seeing myself as a productive person, functioning and vital from the neck up (well, including my hands), while ignoring the needs of the rest of me.

It’s all about the focus.

I need to find a happy medium so that I will, once again, be a happy medium rather than a not-so-happy large. It’s not a matter of size, really. It’s about how I feel having focused for so long on one aspect of me rather than on the entire package of me. I need to find a way to get the exercise I need while still feeling productive and connected to my work. When I’m away from my computer, I’m thinking about what I could be and should be writing. When I’m writing, I don’t feel guilty about not working out, not watching TV, not cavorting with friends.

So, how do I find a happy medium without changing my productive routine? It’s a challenge but one I’m up for. I think. I guess I’ll just have to tape that not-so-flattering photo of the real me on my monitor as a reminder that there is more to life than writing. And then I’ll have to go look for that other thing or those other things that will offer a happy medium of fun, fitness, and life.  It’s time to stop, take a breath, and figure out a way to integrate mind and body more fully. Happy mind, happy body. Happy medium.

 Just for Fun!

 Stop

 

 

 

 

 

2 Comments

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Society

Tagged , , ,

In Search of Patience

Posted on July 8, 2013 | Leave a comment

“Patience and fortitude conquer all things.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

As I think about writing and life and growing older, my mind turns to patience: the idea of patience, of what it means to be patient, to the virtues of patience. Really? Is patience a virtue? Or is that what we tell ourselves while we (actively) wait for something great to happen, for our lives to bloom, for success to finally find us in our most withering moments?

 “He that can have Patience can have what he will.” Benjamin Franklin

Patience 01

As a small child, I had a cat named Patience. I named her myself. I don’t know that I even understood the concept of patience at three or four years old but I understood Patience as she sat by the fire-pit in the backyard waiting for rats to skulk in from the field; waited for me to join her each evening, finding my place beside her as I sat down to wait for my father to come home from work. We sat there together by the ring of ashes as the sun went down, my face and hands, more often than not, dirty with the play of the day, and her face and paws torn and scarred from battles new and old. Patience was my one, true childhood friend. From Patience, I learned patience.

 “Patience is the art of hoping.” Luc de Clapiers, marquis de Vauvenargues (died at 31, famous for his aphorisms and his friendship with Voltaire)

and “Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.” (George Iles)

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.” Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy

I can see that. I have my own on-again-off-again relationship with time as it slithers away fast as a snake or drags on while I wait and hope for good things to come. Patience can only be a by-product of waiting, of finally coming to realize that pacing and fretting and stressing does absolutely no good at all, that finding a balance of calm and acceptance is the only sane answer to the twists and turns of life.

My new favorite quote from Pinterest.

My new favorite quote from Pinterest.

We can only be patient with what happens for us– and I mean for us rather than to us. I believe the Universe acts for us and it is our response to getting what we ask for that puts us in victim mode, thinking that life happens to us. (That’s just my humble opinion.)

“Patience is passion tamed.” Lyman Abbott

. . . with a whip and a chair.

“Patience, n. A minor form of dispair (sic), disquised as a virtue.” Ambrose Bierce

I think this is my favorite. It sometimes feels like it all comes down to this, despair disguised as patience. We have our moments, all of us, when having tamed our passion we slip into despair of ever having what it is we want most in life. But rather than wallow in it, we let the frustration turn to something good and deep, belief in ourselves, in our dreams, in the value of our lives, and find from the wells of hope and fortitude within us the one thing that will help us overcome: patience.

“Patience is the companion of wisdom.” St. Augustine.

And wisdom is, I hope, what we get as the result of a lifetime of sucking it up and  making lemonade.

Just for Fun!

Tree on tracks

So, you’re chugging along on an old weathered but familiar track when suddenly nature happens. Beauty or impediment? Now what?

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Society

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

Life’s Too Short

Posted on July 7, 2013 | 1 comment

Yellow Rose-001

 

We all have to make choices in our lives about who we want to be, what we want our life to be like. Sometimes, those choices feel like they’re out of our control. We put our faith in others to be a reflection of who we are and what we want to be. We lose sight of ourselves, of our mission and life goals, and follow the herd to the closest, easiest watering hole.

Life’s too short to spend even one moment questioning our choices. We have to move forward into being who we are and living the life we want to live.

Be you. Live your life. And have a glorious Sunday!

1 Comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Society, Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , ,

Fear of Falling

Posted on July 6, 2013 | Leave a comment

 Scotland Forest

My daughters and I are leaving for Scotland in nine days. I’m thrilled. I’m excited. I’m terrified! Dreams of falling have begun.

In the midst of travel planning, it’s not unusual for me to have dreams of falling. I’m not really afraid of heights. I can climb a ladder or a cliff (and back down) with the best of them, but there is something about traveling with my family–with my children in particular–that jump-starts in me a deep maternal fear of falling off the face of the earth.

As I closed my eyes last night, I held in my mind a beautiful vision of deep green forests and panoramic Scottish vistas. Just as I was about to drift off to sleep, the terrain changed and I found myself at the edge of a cliff, about to take a step into thin air. I could feel my daughters behind me, talking, laughing, not paying attention. My eyes flew open and I sat straight up in bed as every photo I’ve ever seen of the craggy cliffs of the Scottish Highlands flashed before me. We have to pay attention, I thought to myself. We have to watch our footing and keep an eye on each other. I slept fitfully the rest of the night, tip-toeing around the fear that hovers over me.

Several years ago, I traveled to the Grand Canyon. It’s a thrilling site and for a moment, I wished that my kids were with me to see it. It was December, the rocks around the gorge were shiny and slick  with ice, and little kids skittered and scampered right up to the edge, hung over the wide-spaced bars or crawled under to get a better look. I had to go sit in the car to catch my breath. It wasn’t the height that bothered me. It wasn’t even a fear of falling–not me falling, anyway. It was the kids dancing so precariously close to the edge and their parents blithely watching that made my stomach knot and my head ache. I vowed then and there to never, ever allow my children or my grandchildren to go to the Grand Canyon.

Selfish? Yes. Crazy? Probably. But I could see the headline in my mind: Entire Family Wiped Out in Grand Canyon Fall. I could see it: a grandchild ventures too close to the edge and slips. My daughter reaches for the child, her sister reaches for her, I lunge for them both and we topple over the edge with the rest of the family right behind us, arms outstretched, fingers grasping. Yet, despite my seemingly irrational fear, I’m taking my daughters to Scotland for a ten day romp through the Highlands. Go figure!

Maybe it’s just a cave dweller’s natural trepidation about leaving the comforts of home. Maybe my fears are the result of millions of years of maternal instinct forcing its way to the surface from that deep-seated paleo mind. Whatever, to quote my sixteen-year-old granddaughter. We’re going to be careful; we’re going to have the adventure of a lifetime; we’re going to have a blast! And if we fall, it will be the coolest fall of all: falling in love with Scotland.

Just for Fun!

Bubble 02

An outdoor, see-through comfy cave. I want one!

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Alone in a Crowded Room

Posted on July 3, 2013 | Leave a comment

alone in a crowded room

Most days, it takes a lot to blast me out of my cave. Family events will do it because they’re few and far between; running out of coffee will do it (that’s a given!); a new movie will do it if the movie falls within a finite range of interest (sci-fi, zombies, super heroes, and Tom Hanks); and benefits (or favors) for friends. That’s about it.

A Gathering of Angels: Sunday Funday for Annette!

This past weekend, after the Big Reveal, after the Ocean Pond Clubhouse adventure, I attended a cancer-fund-raising-event for a friend. Annette is an awesome woman, a fighter, a kick-ass warrior who normally plows right through life with a vengeance. Several months ago, she was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. Calling in the angels, her friends and family began working together to raise money to help pay for Annette’s medical treatment. As a waitress, Annette works without the handy perk of medical insurance, much like everyone else I know in this part of the country. To add insult to injury, her treatment involves the need for a shot, one shot, that costs $6,000 per injection. I can’t even begin to imagine what miracle drug must be in that syringe that would warrant a $6,000 price tag, but the doctors say that this is her chance for recovery. Annette’s tumors are shrinking. She looks great despite everything she’s going through, and she has the support of friends and family and a community that has accepted her with open arms.

I stood on the periphery during the event, wandering from the bar inside to the patio out back trying to engage in conversation with people I see at my brother’s gigs, friends of Annette’s, friends of friends, acquaintances, even strangers who have gathered for a common cause. I’m not good at small talk. I’m not really comfortable in crowds. I can’t say that I’d rather I’d stayed home because I wanted to be there for Annette, for my brother who’d helped organize the event and was playing under a leaky tent in pouring rain through thunder and lightning, for his girlfriend Barb (Annette’s sister and a longtime family friend). I wanted to be there in the mix, adding my positive energy to the flowing glow of love that swirled around me. But I still felt like an interloper standing on the fringe of the party not knowing how to engage.

Why is that? I often wonder what it is that makes me so uncomfortable. Have I spent so much time alone that I’ve lost my social skills? I don’t think so. I’ve never had the desire to hang out with the crowd, to be one of the guys, to join the team. Even as a child, I was a loner. I had friends but I was happier one-on-one. My brothers are the same way. We are quiet, introspective people, alone but never lonely. I think it runs in the family.

Family–when you least expect it!

After forty years, I reconnected with a cousin at the event. He’d made contact with my brother a couple of years ago and come up from south Florida to support Annette. He immediately reminded me of my brothers with his calm, happy demeanor. He is gentle and kind and quiet. I watched him move through the crowd like me, a part of it but separate. I admit, I don’t really know my cousin well after our short time together but I felt a kindred spirit gazing back at me, a person happy to observe, to support, and to stand on the sidelines, happy to be alone in a crowded room. Maybe he’s even a cave dweller like me. I hope to get to know him better and find out.

 Just for Fun!

A black labrador dog is decorated for a Fourth of July Picnic

There is no way in the world I would be able to get my look-alike black lab Bella to stand still long enough to attach a holiday bow but I thought this photo (from Pinterest) was appropriate for how I’ll be spending my 4th of July. I hope you have a safe and happy holiday! See you soon!

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Society

Tagged , , , , , ,

World War Z: We’re Gonna Need a Bigger Cave!

Posted on July 2, 2013 | Leave a comment

world-war-z-movie-wallpaper-6018

If you read yesterday’s post, A Cave After My Own Heart, you know that one of the highlights of my visit with family this past weekend was the opportunity to explore the 109 year old Ocean Pond Clubhouse. It’s a beautiful place situated seemingly out in the middle of nowhere and surrounded by an alligator and snake infested swamp. Very picturesque. Now, imagine the creaking, creeping sounds generated by an old wood-frame house buffeted by wind and rain, all of the attendant shadows from dimmed lamps, animal skulls, and an intermittent moon layered over the after-images of a horror movie flickering on the insides of your eyelids. And not just any movie, a zombie movie! World War Z!

A sweet afternoon party–punctuated by fear and popcorn

I think I’ve mentioned before that my youngest daughter is a zombie freak. She is both terrified and fascinated by the idea of a zombie apocalypse. So, for her birthday, after the big reveal that we are actually going to Scotland rather than Tahiti in July, after the conferring on her the title of Lady of Glencoe by a tall, good-looking Scotsman in full kilted regalia, with sword and sash no less, we went to the movies to watch zombies take over the world. Once again–YIKES!

For once, I am very happy that the movie is, so far as I’ve read, nothing like the book. I’m only about a third of way through and I’ve yet to encounter the thread that ties to the movie beyond the fact that these are, indeed, very fast moving undead. Or walking dead. Or the reanimated. Call them what you will, they are extremely creepy, resourceful, and although not Walking-Dead-gory, scary as hell.

If you haven’t seen World War Z, I’ll try not to spoil it for you. Besides, if you’ve seen the movie trailer, you’ve pretty much seen the movie as there are very few remaining surprises. (Don’t you hate that?) I knew when to cover my eyes, when to look away from the screen, but for this movie, I wish I’d thought about ear plugs. During what could have been the goriest of scenes, the camera tended to focus away from the action, but the sound effects were explicitly clear, emphasizing the gnashing of teeth and the snap of the bite.

BOOM!

The first inkling of trouble comes with a boom off in the distance, sounding much like the M-80s the kids down the street from me have been setting off in anticipation of the upcoming holiday. The noise sets my dogs to barking and sends chills up my spine. I know, it was only a movie, but the aural sensation, even without the visual, is spectacularly jarring.

Back at Ocean Pond, in the big old house with a million windows and creaking wood floors, each sound exacerbated a sense of doom. Forget ghostly specters; forget crazed ax murders. That scraping noise, that clawing sound? That backfire out on the highway? That could only be one thing: they’re here! Zombies! Which makes my next present for my daughter a no-brainer (pun intended).

world-war-z-book-summary-19

Are you a movie fan? If so, take the poll and let me know what you think.

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Movies, Society

Tagged , ,

A Cave After My Own Heart

Posted on July 1, 2013 | Leave a comment

Being away from the cave is usually an interesting event for me. Putting on my social face and going out into the world is definitely not stepping into my happy place, but occasionally, I have to just suck it up and do it. This past weekend, it was for a good cause. Well, two good causes actually. I had fun but I’m happy to be home.

Ocean Pond 02

My daughter and her family are house-sitting at a beautiful old fishing camp not far from their home. The house, built in 1904, is as Walton-esque as it gets with a wide wrap-around, screened-in front porch lined with rocking chairs facing a huge three-pronged lake and a rabbit hutch cozied into a corner.

Ocean Pond: The End of the Road

Just driving down the single-lane dirt road with over-arching pin and water oaks laden with Spanish moss transported me to a state of quietude and peace–once I’d gotten over my wariness of entering this respite from home with its real threat of alligators, rattlesnakes, and snapping turtles. (And it is a real threat. People have gone missing in this lake, fishermen stepping onto the shore at the wrong time and at the wrong place.)

OP trees 02

Inside, the first floor of the house is set up for entertaining. There are two industrial strength kitchens with massive gas ranges and restaurant-ready refrigerators. Four dining rooms hold massive wooden tables and enough chairs to seat a small army. Typical lodge artifacts line the walls: fish, alligator skulls, lures, nets, paintings and posters and newspaper articles about adventures long forgotten. I could imagine this place in its heyday filled with fishermen lounging by the fireplaces (of which there are many), drinks in hand, telling fish stories while waiting for the evening meal to be served.

The house was built as a bed and breakfast for camp members, and was, according to the articles on the walls, a good place for a Saturday night dinner out on the town with friends from New York, or LA, or Savannah. I admit I couldn’t quite picture that scenario given that this place is situated precisely at the end of the road less traveled but I suppose these members must have been hearty folk to begin with to spend their days on waters infested with every manner of dangerous critter. And it must have been a hoot to drag their guests, willing or unwilling, out into the swamps for a meal.

The second floor is the caretaker’s home, a four bedroom, three bath apartment with tall windows (with original glass) and thick carpet over creaking hardwood floors. There are cabinets and closets galore, a central dining room, and a living room on the north end overlooking the lake. It’s homey and comfortable and “creepy as all get out” in the words of my grandson.

Rocking chairs 02

It was a little creepy but it’s a cave dweller’s dream, nestled far away from the hustle of life. I drank my morning coffee while I lounged in a rocking chair older than me on a porch built before my grandfather was born. I felt at peace while I rocked and dreamed and realized that this was a cave after my own heart.

Leave a comment

Posted in Fun Stuff, Uncategorized

Tagged , , ,

The Joy (and Power) of Being Right Here

Posted on June 26, 2013 | 2 comments

Over the past few weeks, Cave Dweller has become a fun and important part of my daily life. I appreciate those of you who stop by to visit my blog on a regular or a transitory basis, taking a moment out of your day to read and/or comment. Your comments are important to me and I’m equally happy to receive emails or messages on my Facebook page.

Yesterday, I was asked how the idea for Cave Dweller came about. I’d like to say that I was struck by a moment of divine inspiration, which feels kind of true, but actually, for quite some time, I’ve been looking for a place to share my thoughts on what has become a major theme in my writing: living alone in a social world. Cave Dweller has become that outlet for me and for what I want to say.

On June 1, 2013, my blog post at colleensayre.com put into perspective some of my thoughts about life and writing so I suppose this was a defining moment for me in moving away from writing about writing to writing about life. This feels like the kick-starter for Cave Dweller and I suppose I have my son to thank for that (among a myriad of other fine things).

What follows is an approximation of my June 1, post. (I guess I could have just inserted a link to the page–the better to get you to browse my website–but I like it here in my little cave and didn’t want to send you adventuring unnecessarily.) The layout is different from the original but the content remains the same:

Sandy Feet

My son wants to buy a boat. I got a text message from him this morning at 6:54, which means it’s 3:54 where he is. “Nevermind why I’m up . . . the bottom of Hello is cut off!” he said from 2,000 miles away. I read this as I sat drinking my nth cup of coffee and wondering what else I could do to promote my book (which was released last night) besides send a tweet every five seconds and plaster Facebook with ads and promos and the usual pleas of “please buy my book.”

Happy Dance

[BTW: I found an app called Buncee that makes posters and invitations and all kinds of cool stuff on the fly and I wanted to give it a try. I’d seen a cool .gif of a cat doing a happy dance on Bing and was intrigued by the “make your own” tagline. So, I whipped up a little picture with a book announcement (alas, I couldn’t figure out how to make the cat or to make this one dance) and posted it at about 6:52. Come “like” me on Facebook to see my Buncee.]

At 6:55, I repaired the truncated Hello (a very easy fix), thanked my son for the alert, and then read that he’d “spent the night reading about sailing certifications. Just need a boat big enough to carry the ‘Dragon’ onboard.”

My response? OMG!

Dragon

The “Dragon” is his motorcycle, his escape hatch, his get-out-of-jail-free card. It is his parachute, his springboard, and his path to sanity. But now he wants to buy a boat. I’m wondering where on earth he wants to ride that requires three vehicles to get there: the car to haul the boat, the boat to haul the bike, the bike to haul his butt all over creation so that he can feel free and untethered.

Don’t get me wrong! I love adventuring. I love my son. I love that my son loves to go adventuring. But I’m also wondering when my son will realize that he has already arrived. He’s there. He’s here! The adventure is happening all around him. Maybe he already has realized it and my worry is just a mother’s frenzy over her son’s desire for yet another dangerous toy. Or maybe it’s just that I’ve been reading about and thinking about the art of staying put and contemplating how to find my own joy.

Martha Beck (www.MarthaBeck.com) has written an interesting piece for O Magazine this month: “The Grass Ain’t Greener.” (Sorry, I couldn’t find a direct link to the article but it can be found in the “May We Help You?” section.) Beck’s focus is FOMO, Fear Of Missing Out. What it really boils down to is this: from this side of the fence (or the computer screen), it seems to me that everyone has a happier, more exciting, more extravagant life than I do. And I want what everybody else has!

The article got me thinking. Being a fear-based phenomenon, FOMO creates all kinds of problems not the least of which is the anxiety created from rushing around from here to there and back again looking for a place, your place, the place where you will feel at home—even temporarily. It seems that almost immediately after arriving at our destination, the wheels begin to turn yet again and we plot and plan how to get to an even better place with barely a glance at the spot in which we’re standing.

I had a mentor back in the ‘90s who used to insist that the only way to find true peace and happiness is to “bloom where you’re planted.” Mildred Ramsey found inspiration and courage to live an action-packed life, traveling around the country giving seminars and selling her book, The Super Supervisor, wherever she happened to be standing. Mildred could carve out her own little piece of sacred ground, till the soil, and plant her seeds in a dusty parking lot while selling books from the trunk of her car. She’s one of the few people I’ve met in my life who could be on the move, rushing in ten different directions, and still be totally centered and at home wherever she stood. (And without a hair out of place, I might add!)

Unlike Mildred, I think most of us are constantly searching for the next thing that will bring us joy or happiness or security, searching for that little piece of ourselves that’s blowing on a breeze in the far off reaches of somewhere else. There is joy and power in being right here and right now. There is something adventurous about experiencing this moment, breathing this air, in this place of all places.

Mildred Ramsey

I think the magic of life, the cure for FOMO, is finding ourselves in the now, in this blink-of-an-eye moment of life, cherishing it, and then taking that joy into the next moment—no matter where we find ourselves.

As a writer, I have to keep reminding myself that it’s okay to find my joy in the writing process rather than in the number of books I sell. I am happy at my desk with the world revolving right outside my window. I’m creating my own worlds, my own friends, my own experiences and finding pleasure in the sensation of living with one foot on the floor and the other resting on the haunch of the black lab curled up at my feet. Mind you, it took me 42 moves to get here and there were moments when I believed that the gods were playing some weird game of chess with my life, but I’m here. In this moment. Breathing this air. And I am thankful for it.

Life is what it is. And it’s ours. Here and now. Bring on the joy!

And Topher. . . Sweetie . . . don’t buy the boat! 🙂

2 Comments

Posted in Fun Stuff, Inspiration, Internet, Society, Uncategorized

Tagged , , ,